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Being Scared while Creating A New Relationship

Have you ever had to create a relationship with someone in the business that you find daunting?

Maybe you are concerned because you don’t know how to prepare for them. Or maybe you are hoping to get some business from them to such a degree and you don’t want to lose this oppertunity. So you over prepare for the meeting in your mind.

I will admit I was more than concerned. And, truthfully, I was scared about meeting my in-laws a few weeks after Kevin and I had met and decided we wanted to be together. What if they didn’t like me and Kevin decided that he wasn’t going to marry me because of them? Kevin had been talking to me about his relationship with his parents. Early on, I realised that they were a really close family.

Maybe you know something about the relationships that your (possible) business has and are worried about muscling in on the group. Or maybe there is someone in the office that you don’t know well, but they have a great relationship with somebody you wish to impress in another team but it scares you to try?

When Kevin and I arrived at the house for Sunday lunch and dinner, Mary (his mother) offered me a cup of tea. I really do appreciate a cup of tea any time of the day. As she was handing it to me, I could see her hands were shaking.

I realised she was just as or even more terrified of me, as I was of her.

As you go to meet a new client and do new work for them, you don’t know if they have had bad experiences before. What if they are now wary of what you are going to do? In fact, for all you know, they could be as wary and scared as well. Even more so than you are. Truth is you never know what they are thinking or planning to do and vice versa.

If you are going into a job and are desperate for things to go well, just remember that they could be nervous as well. You don’t know what has gone on in their minds or lives before you see them.

Take heart, see and recognise that the fear that has held you up is not necessarily justified. The person you are talking to could be as scared as you that something will go wrong. Or that you will not be able to produce the work they need.

You can do this.

Just imagine that the people you are seeing are as scared as you.

Work out how you would put them at ease.

Show them that you are more than capable of doing the work required.

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